Lifeline
by jublke
Summary: Someone reaches out to Han when he is frightened and alone.


This is my first _Star Wars_ fanfic, set between ESB and RoTJ. I'm not yet sure if I'll be adding to this, so it's a stand-alone for now.

My thanks to my husband & sons for beta-reading this one for me. This story is a work of fan-fiction. _Star Wars_ and its related characters were conceived by George Lucas and are now owned by Disney. I don't own any of this.

* * *

"Han?"

The faint voice echoed, as if someone was calling to him from a great distance. Han tried to clear his muddled thoughts - why was it so hard to think? - and attempted to place a name with the voice. No such luck. His mind was simply too addled for rational thought. It hurt too much to think anyway. Better to let the inky blackness devour him. He slid back toward unconsciousness when the voice sounded again, stronger this time.

"Han? Can you hear me? Are you all right?"

Han's mind snapped awake. His thoughts began cycling faster. *Luke?*

"I found you." Even without seeing the young man, Han could picture Luke's sunny smile, his smug satisfaction at having found his friend. But the warmth Han felt at being reunited with Luke brought back other, less pleasant, sensations.

*I'm cold.* Han had long stopped receiving sensory input from his extremities. Now, he found he could once again feel his fingers and toes. *Sithspit, it hurts.*

"It's all right, Han." Luke's voice was confident. "Don't overexert yourself. Lean on me for a minute."

In an instant, Han felt bathed in pure white light, the scent of fresh linens, the warmth of a summer's day. Leia was running next to him, flowers in her hair, her dark tresses flowing behind her as she laughed and ran ahead of him, just out of his reach. Han lifted his hand to join her ...

A piercing cry. Distantly, Han realized that the voice was his, the violent assault of pain brutal and immediate when he had attempted to move his hand. The agony of losing Leia again was even more overpowering than the gripping cold. And he couldn't sense Luke's presence now at all. Where was he?

*Luke!* Han remembered that fateful day when he almost lost the kid on Hoth. As his desperation rose, he felt his lungs ineffectually try to inflate, trying in vain to pump air into a useless body. He mentally bit down on the fear overtaking his mind.

"I'm right here, Han." The younger man's voice was soft but steady.

*Thank the gods. I need your help, kid. I can't move.* Han tried to keep his panic down, but his mind continued to whirl. *I'm so cold. I think I must be frozen. I can't seem to wake up. Why can't I wake up? I must be dying.*

Sudden recognition pierced his mind. He wasn't saying the words aloud, so Luke couldn't have heard him. It was another trick of the mind. *I really am going crazy. Luke isn't here. I'm all alone. Again. They abandoned me, just like my parents did. Nobody really cares. Why should they? I'm a nerf herder. I never got a chance to tell Leia how much I love her. No wonder she hates me. And Luke, I gave that kid such hard time about all that Force nonsense but blast it, I miss him. I love him, that stupid, idealistic -*

"Han!"

*What?*

"I'm still here, Han. We haven't abandoned you. I'm probing your mind using the Force."

Han's thoughts spun. *Is that even possible?* If it was true, it meant that Luke was reading his thoughts, all of his thoughts, including the vulnerable and weak ones he tried so hard to conceal.

"Yes, Han, it's possible. I'm here and I ... I love you, too."

Han could feel his heart thudding in his chest. Had it not been beating before? Why had it started now? The sensation of pain seared across his consciousness like Force lightning and he cried out mentally, feeling an acute sense of embarrassment when he heard Luke gasp and recoil.

When Luke spoke again, his voice was very faint. "I'm sorry, Han. I've got to go."

The Corellian felt rising anger. *Of course, you're leaving. No one ever stays.*

"Han, I wish I could stay. But I can't. I promise I'll come back to check in on you."

*Check in on me? What's the matter with you, kid? Get me the hell out of here!* The anger that welled within him brought another layer of awareness, another violent surge of pain. He cried out in agony. *You said you wouldn't leave!*

Luke's voice emerged in his mind, ragged but firm. "Han, you need to calm down. I promise, we're doing everything in our power to rescue you. I'd stay with you if I could."

Han could feel Luke's sincerity, almost picture the tears running down the younger man's face. *Is he crying over me?* The thought was strangely comforting.

"Han, I'm still learning how to use the Force in this way. Yoda says it's too dangerous for me to link with you for very long. I might hurt you. I can't risk waking you up."

*Why?*

Han was sure that Luke could read his puzzlement, but the young Jedi chose to ignore it. "I have to go now, Han. I promise I'll be back. Stay strong. Remember that we love you." Han could almost see Leia, holding Luke's hand, sharing in his prayers for Han's safety. The smuggler felt a warmth in his mind.

And then, just as abruptly, the light went out. As Luke's presence left Han's mind, he felt an acute and cutting sense of loneliness, a deep ache of the soul. His thoughts turned against him, railing that while his friends were safe, he was still utterly and bitterly alone. Without a lifeline to hold onto, the murky darkness that was carbonite once again reached out, grabbed him by the soul, and dragged him back under.


End file.
